Thursday, April 15, 2010

Religion vs. Relationship

If anyone knows me they know that I am a devout christian with a wild spirit.  That's the best way I can describe myself.  I was never a quiet personality.  I'm loud, outgoing, outspoken, and I love to have fun.  I enjoy music, sports, entertainment, fashion and still have a strong commitment to my RELATIONSHIP with Christ.  Of course I make mistakes in my life and I'm no where near perfect but I respect, fear, and love God, and follow his commandments and I'm the same person around everyone.  I believe that some saints go wrong when they get so caught up in religion they forget about relationship.  This world doesnt define me nor does the church I attend define me, but who I am in Christ defines me.  He made me this way for a reason.  So many people run from the church because Christians can be so pretentious, they get so caught up they forget how to actually relate to people and show love. There is so much focus on what a person should be wearing, how they hair should be fixed, the outside appearance and their insides are filthy.  They walk around with a chip on their shoulder and are forever guarded and then have the audacity to want to minister to others.  Whose going to listen to you if you're that uptight.  Honestly who can feel comfortable around that. 

People tend to forget that change is a process not an event, and the changes that occur on the inside will reflect on the outside.  God works on the innerman and then moves to the outer.  It really shouldnt matter whether or not my hair is locked or my skirt hemline is on the ground, or whether I worship on saturday or wednesday.  God reveals different things to us in each of our walks so that we may grow and help others, not impose our personal views.  When we get caught up in the above matters then it becomes more religious work.  I know for a fact that many of my friends know where I stand when it comes to my walk with Christ.  They also feel comfortable enough to seek advice and talk to me without feeling judged.  My example of living, my attitude had compelled some of them to seek him as well.  We should be inspiring others not making them run away. We all talk about Jesus and his walk but if you really study Jesus you would see, he had compassion for everyone.  He ministered to their needs without damning them to hell, he listened before he tried to fix a problem, and all those he helped felt comfortable enough to come to him.  He inpired others to talk about living right and didnt impose physical retraints on them, and he loved unconditionally.  Now dont get me wrong, he did call out people's wrongs but mostly the hypocrites who were calling themselves Christians but were really acting like heathens in their attitudes and he didnt sugar coat SIN!

God is working on me daily and my prayer is that I continue to inspire those around me to love Christ as much as I do and not make them run.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Why Did I Get Married Too?

So my boyfriend and I went to see "Why Did I Get Married Too" today and oh boy.  I dont want to ruin the movie for anyone so if you haven't seen it then I suggest you dont read this blog.  So part two was definitely a lot more extreme than part one and I can't front the women in this movie were straight trippin' but I couldn't help but sympathize with SOME of their situations.

Angela:  The history with Angela and her husband is she's caught him cheating in the past on numerous occasions and he is a chronic liar which is why she is so stir crazy besides all the drinking.  So now by the sequel he's turned over a new leaf and is supposedly faithful. But by now the damage is done and he cant go use the bathroom without her getting suspicious.  Big issue in the movie she wants the password to his cell phone.  Her methods of trying to get it, I will say are annooying and I wouldnt give it to her either just because she is annoying but i digress.  I believe they never worked at the issues at hand to ease her mind.  This is a monster he created and therefore he needs to take that responsibility and appease her and give her what she needs to ease her mind.  I do feel however that if she is choosing to stay that she needs to make the decision to either trust him and shut up or leave.  NO ONE, I mean NO ONE wants to deal with that drama for the rest of their lives.

Diane:  SHE WAS DEAD WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Her issue is just not getting enough of what she needs from her marraige.  Probably things got redundant, they are great, she's not bored but its missing something and instead of speaking to her husband she decided to entertain another man.  Big MISTAKE!!!  She was emotionally cheating.  I mean really thinking of another man while making love to your husband.  Brngng home the flowers the other man bought you.  She was asking for trouble.  Now if recall they had huge communication issues from the first movie.  He wanted more children and she didnt.  Now I know the word says when you get married your body is no longer your own but I had to sympathize with her on that one.  It's not easy carrying a human being for nine months.  So many of my friends are pregnant and let me tell you the stories you hear will scare you into adopting for the rest of your life. Was she right to tie her tubes without telling her husband?  No she was wrong but I dont blame her cause somehow he was not hearing her out. She was also neglecting him which was causing more issues.

Patty:  Perfect Patty who was always in control.  I feel for her.  She had not yet dealt with the issue of losing their son. Its hard.  Its easier to fix everyone elses problems and not deal with your own.  She still blames herself. As a mother, that can be classified as failure, my honest opinion I really dont think her husband was understanding enough.  I do agree she could've met him half way and tried but arguing with her is definitely not the answer.  Which is why she takes the lead in everything, I feel that is her coping mechanism.  "No more room for mistakes."  Even the divorce settlement was done so that it looked peaceful until of course everything got vengeful.  That's where i took her side.  Did he really have to go that far?  I understand he didnt want the divorce but that might've been better and given her space to really deal with her issues.  Then the burning of the baby pictures, the man handling her, and the pooring of alcohol on her.  I was infuriated.  That was beyond disrespectful.  I don't care how angry you are, it should have never gotten there.  So when she went bananas and broke everything in the house, I cant blame her at all.  I would've beat him in the head with the golf club. In the end their actions led to his demise.  We should really think about the things we do before we do them.  Even in our rage.  The word says anger and sin not.

Sheila: Sheila's marraige wasnt a bad one.  She's finally happy.  Her husband treats her well and talks to her.  Their issue was his pride and finding a common ground.  We as women want to help, we go into this automatic fix it mode and we need to know our man is okay even if the situation is bleek.  It's like she said, "you're putting me in a bad head space," no one needs reminders of their past relationship and all the crazy that transpired.  It's like I'm with you and things are supposed to be different.  Now I will admit she was wrong for asking for help from her ex.  That was just insane but he could've been more understanding about her sharing things with her girls.  It's a natural thing, this is her family and they been doing it long before he was around.  I get that she should've complied with his wishes and kept their business personal but like I said these same women comforted her through so much, it's natural.  Also her husband should, "know his woman."

This movie boils down to the fact that every relationship needs trust, understanding, and communication.  I know that many people werent fans of it however that is the best thing to pull from it.  Evaluate how you interact with your own spouse in good and bad times and how you may be hurting each other. Try to stay away from being confrontational.  Do not let the sun go down on your wrath.  Anger and sin not. Remember your relationships are a form of minstry as well.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

The bunny or the Lamb

So today is Easter Sunday and unfortunately  I have the flu.  Now I am a regular church goer, saved, sanctfied, filled with the holy spirit, and not just a sunday Christian, you know the whole shabang.  So I treat this sunday like any other, I got my rediculously sick butt up, hacking lung and all and carried myself to church and to my surprise which i should be surprised tada, it's packed and I CAN'T GET IN!.  I'm a regular member. Why should i have to brace myself to get to church two hours early every year just because of this fiasco/circus show? Are you kidding me?  Why is it packed because everyone who doesnt think about church all year round decides easter sunday is that day to go.  So now there is a line that is circling the entire perimeter of the block, i was like, "y am i even surprised?" but i was too sick to stand on a line for an hour so i left.

I mean what is it with this tradition that no one seems to be able to explain.  There is no real understanding to the meaning of Ressurection Sunday.  What is the point if you leave the church the same way you came in?  Only to come back three times a year the following year.  Don't get me wrong, I'm enthused for anyone excited to hear the word but to go just for the fashion show, what is the point?  All your doing is perpetuating the cycle for your children to do the same.  Go to church and not understand what you are really supposed to be going to church for, and it not for the oversized hideous pastel hat and the suit that matches.  It's about understanding the ressurection, why Jesus died for our sins, the uncondtional love of God.  Why we take this walk and journey as christians, the wonders of the redeeming blood.  To have the perfect peace and joy in your life despite all that goes on around you.  It transforms you, allows you to forgive and forget, and love unconditionally.

So my prayer is that all those who attend church on easter sunday, christmas, and mother's day that you do get something from it.  That you don't leave the same way you entered the building.  That a seed is planted and you are truly transformed by what you've learned about the love of christ and hopefully i'll see you all the other sundays, possibly some tuesdays, and other events and we can fellowship together.  Then I wouldnt be so upset that I had to wait in line for an hour to get into church.